Famous Quotes from Inspirational People

  "There are certainly moments," said Chad,....
"There are certainly moments," said Chad, "when you seem to me too good to be true. Yet if you are true," he added, "that seems to be all that need concern me."-- Henry James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The Puritans gave thanks for being....
The Puritans gave thanks for being preserved from the Indians, and we give thanks for being preserved from the Puritans.-- Finley Peter Dunne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Almost nobody dances sober, unless they....
Almost nobody dances sober, unless they happen to be insane.-- H. P. Lovecraft

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Who so would be a man,....
Who so would be a man, must be a nonconformist.-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Do not do to others what....
Do not do to others what angers you if done to you by others.-- Socrates

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There is nothing wrong with America....
There is nothing wrong with America that cannot be cured by what is right with America.-- Bill Clinton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In general, the greater the understanding,....
In general, the greater the understanding, the greater the delusion: the more intelligent, the less sane.-- George Orwell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  MERCY, n. An attribute beloved of....
MERCY, n. An attribute beloved of detected offenders.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I LIKE ads. It's not that....
I LIKE ads. It's not that we don't like ads, we just don't like ads when they are out of place.-- Bill Barnes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In order to improve the mind,....
In order to improve the mind, we ought less to learn, than to contemplate.-- Rene Descartes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Lead me not into temptation; I....
Lead me not into temptation; I can find the way myself.-- Rita Mae Brown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When a child asks you something,....
When a child asks you something, answer him, for goodness' sake!-- Harper Lee

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Technological progress has merely provided us....
Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards.-- Aldous Huxley

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The postman always rings twice.-- James....
The postman always rings twice.-- James M. Cain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Eloquence is in the assembly, not....
Eloquence is in the assembly, not merely in the speaker.-- William Pitt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It isn't kind to cultivate a....
It isn't kind to cultivate a friendship just so one will have an audience.-- Lawana Blackwell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Tomorrow's life is too late. Live....
Tomorrow's life is too late. Live today.-- Marcus Valerius Martialis

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  For whom the Lord loveth he....
For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  To choose Norm Coleman over Walter....
To choose Norm Coleman over Walter Mondale is like going to a great steakhouse and ordering the tuna sandwich.-- Garrison Keillor

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  CUI BONO? [Latin] What good would....
CUI BONO? [Latin] What good would that do _me_?-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Art washes away from the soul,....
Art washes away from the soul, the dust of everyday living.-- Pablo Picasso

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We cherish our friends not for....
We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for ours to amuse them.-- Evelyn Waugh

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Doubts are more cruel than the....
Doubts are more cruel than the worst of truths.-- Moliere

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  LOQUACITY, n. A disorder which renders....
LOQUACITY, n. A disorder which renders the sufferer unable to curb his tongue when you wish to talk.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There are some defeats more triumphant....
There are some defeats more triumphant than victories.-- Michel de Montaigne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Trade-offs have been with us ever....
Trade-offs have been with us ever since the late unpleasantness in the Garden of Eden.-- Thomas Sowell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The intermediate stage between socialism and....
The intermediate stage between socialism and capitalism is alcoholism.-- Norman Brenner

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Once conform, once do what other....
Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and a lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.-- Virginia Woolf

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We are a spectacular, splendid manifestation....
We are a spectacular, splendid manifestation of life. We have language. . . . We have affection We have genes for usefulness, and usefulness is about as close to a "common goal" of nature as I can guess at. And finally, and perhaps best of all, we have music.-- Lewis Thomas

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You give but little when you....
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.-- Kahlil Gibran

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Knowledge is love and light and....
Knowledge is love and light and vision.-- Helen Keller

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you put butter and salt....
If you put butter and salt on it, it tastes like salty butter.-- Terry Pratchett

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All your life you live so....
All your life you live so close to truth it becomes a permanent blur in the corner of your eye. And when something nudges it into outline, it's like being ambushed by a grotesque.-- Tom Stoppard

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The hardest thing in life is....
The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn.-- David Russell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One doesn't discover new lands without....
One doesn't discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time. -- Andre Gide

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never do anything when you are....
Never do anything when you are in a temper, for you will do everything wrong.-- Baltasar Gracian

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Once you figure out who you....
Once you figure out who you are and what you love about yourself, I think it all kinda falls into place."-- Jennifer Aniston

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  SATIETY, n. The feeling that one....
SATIETY, n. The feeling that one has for the plate after he has eaten its contents, madam.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Everywhere I go I'm asked if....
Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a best-seller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.-- Flannery O'Connor

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  To get thine ends, lay bashfulness....
To get thine ends, lay bashfulness aside; Who fears to ask, doth teach to be deny'd.-- Robert Herrick

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is a common enough case,....
It is a common enough case, that of a man being suddenly captivated by a woman nearly the opposite of his ideal.-- George Eliot

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You can't separate peace from freedom....
You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom.-- Malcolm X

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Courage and perseverance have a magical....
Courage and perseverance have a magical talisman, before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish into air.-- John Quincy Adams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If a rhinoceros were to enter....
If a rhinoceros were to enter this resteraunt now, there is no denying he would have great power here. But I would be the first to rise and assure him that he had no authority whatever.-- G. K. Chesterton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The men who had hated [the....
The men who had hated [the book], and had not particularly loved Helvétius, flocked round him now. Voltaire forgave him all injuries, intentional or unintentional. 'What a fuss about an omelette!' he had exclaimed when he heard of the burning. How abominably unjust to persecute a man for such an airy trifle as that! 'I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it,' was his attitude now. --

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I think the first virtue is....
I think the first virtue is to restrain the tongue; he approaches nearest to gods who knows how to be silent, even though he is in the right.-- Cato the Elder

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Let us make a special effort....
Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other, so we can have some conversation.-- Judith Martin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Once a word has been allowed....
Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.-- Horace

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is difficult to produce a....
It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.-- Rod Serling

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I was not born to be....
I was not born to be forced. I will breathe after my own fashion.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It never pays to deal with....
It never pays to deal with the flyweights of the world. They take far too much pleasure in thwarting you at every turn.-- Sue Grafton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  For a successful technology, reality must....
For a successful technology, reality must take precedence over public relations, for Nature cannot be fooled.-- Richard Feynman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  After a certain high level of....
After a certain high level of technical skill is achieved, science and art tend to coalesce in esthetics, plasticity, and form. The greatest sceintists are always artists as well.-- Albert Einstein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is foolish to wish for....
It is foolish to wish for beauty. Sensible people never either desire it for themselves or care about it in others. If the mind be but well cultivated, and the heart well disposed, no one ever cares for the exterior.-- Anne Bronte

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A diplomat is a person who....
A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.-- Caskie Stinnett

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No one should do a job....
No one should do a job he can do in his sleep.-- Cory Doctorow

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Ask not what you can do....
Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch.-- Orson Welles

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's picture....
Happiness is seeing your mother-in-law's picture on the back of a milk carton.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What is conservativism? Is it not....
What is conservativism? Is it not the aherence to the old and tried against the new and untried?-- Abraham Lincoln

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am just going outside and....
I am just going outside and may be some time.-- Captain Lawrence Oates

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A soft answer turneth away wrath:....
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You see, wire telegraph is a....
You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.-- Albert Einstein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I prefer the company of peasants....
I prefer the company of peasants because they have not been educated sufficiently to reason incorrectly.-- Michel de Montaigne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The true test of a civilization....
The true test of a civilization is not the census, nor the size of the cities, nor the crops—no, but the kind of man the country turns out.-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The essence of intelligence is skill....
The essence of intelligence is skill in extracting meaning from everyday experience.-- Unknown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  [Feminism is] a socialist, anti-family, political....
[Feminism is] a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.-- Pat Robertson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Ignorance and bungling with love are....
Ignorance and bungling with love are better than wisdom and skill without.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The sands are number'd that make....
The sands are number'd that make up my life.-- William Shakespeare

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It's innocence when it charms us,....
It's innocence when it charms us, ignorance when it doesn't.-- Mignon McLaughlin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  That man that hath a tongue,....
That man that hath a tongue, I say, is no man,-- William_Shakespeare/"

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is difficult to get a....
It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his job depends on not understanding it.-- Upton Sinclair

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Love is a gross exaggeration of....
Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everyone else.-- William Shakespeare

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Life itself is a quotation.-- Jorge....
Life itself is a quotation.-- Jorge Luis Borges

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Consult your friend on all things,....
Consult your friend on all things, especially on those which respect yourself. His counsel may then be useful where your own self-love might impair your judgment.-- Seneca

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Let us so live that when....
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Help thy brother's boat across, and....
Help thy brother's boat across, and lo! thine own has reached the shore. -- Hindu Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking....
PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking the pocket through the scalp. It consists in locating and exploiting the organ that one is a dupe with.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You're not drunk if you can....
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.-- Dean Martin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Good taste is the enemy of....
Good taste is the enemy of creativity-- Pablo Picasso

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Any fool can make a rule,....
Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Truth fears no questions.-- Anonymous ....
Truth fears no questions.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When my country, into which I....
When my country, into which I had just set my foot, was set on fire about my ears, it was time to stir. It was time for every man to stir.-- Thomas Paine

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Train up a fig tree in....
Train up a fig tree in the way it should go, and when you are old sit under the shade of it.-- Charles Dickens

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Life is like an ever-shifting kaleidoscope....
Life is like an ever-shifting kaleidoscope - a slight change, and all patterns alter.-- Sharon Salzberg

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Repression is not the way to....
Repression is not the way to virtue. When people restain themselves out of fear, their lives are by necessity diminished. Only through freely chosen discipline can life be enjoyed and still kept within the bounds of reason.-- Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nonviolence is the answer to the....
Nonviolence is the answer to the crucial political and moral questions of our time; the need for mankind to overcome oppression and violence without resorting to oppression and violence. Mankind must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.-- Martin Luther King Jr.

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Even on the highest throne in....
Even on the highest throne in the world, we are still sitting on our ass.-- Michel de Montaigne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A book of quotations . .....
A book of quotations . . . can never be complete.-- Robert M. Hamilton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Like all weak men he laid....
Like all weak men he laid an exaggerated stress on not changing one's mind.-- W. Somerset Maugham

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you shoot at mimes, should....
If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer?-- Steven Wright

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Old people think young people haven't....
Old people think young people haven't learned about love. Young people think old people have forgotten about love. -- Isaac Asimov

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Teaching is as sacred as priesthood.....
Teaching is as sacred as priesthood. If one has not the concern for humanity, the love of living creatures, the vision of the priest and artist, he must not teach.-- Pearl Buck

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ARRAYED, pp. Drawn up and given....
ARRAYED, pp. Drawn up and given an orderly disposition, as a rioter hanged to a lamppost.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One ought every day at least....
One ought every day at least to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and, if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words.-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All action is of the mind....
All action is of the mind and the mirror of the mind is the face, its index the eyes.-- Cicero

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If marriage is your object,-- Author....
If marriage is your object,-- Author Unknown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A better world shall emerge based....
A better world shall emerge based on faith and understanding.-- General Douglas MacArthur

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Use what talents you possess: the....
Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.-- Henry Van Dyke

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  EPAULET, n. An ornamented badge, serving....
EPAULET, n. An ornamented badge, serving to distinguish a military officer from the enemy -- that is to say, from the officer of lower rank to whom his death would give promotion.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Not nail a great star to....
Not nail a great star to its track, . . .--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  People in general are scared to....
People in general are scared to death of the war and all the exhibition have been a failure, because the rich - don't want to buy anything.-- Frida Kahlo

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No one can be a great....
No one can be a great thinker who does not recognize that as a thinker it is his first duty to follow his intellect to whatever conclusions it may lead. Truth gains more even by the errors of one who, with due study, and preparation, thinks for himself, than by the true opinions of those who only hold them because they do not suffer themselves to think.-- John Stuart Mill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It's not my Goddamn planet! Understand,....
It's not my Goddamn planet! Understand, Monkey-Boy?-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Writers should be read but not....
Writers should be read but not seen. Rarely are they a winsome sight.-- Edna Ferber

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Irresponsible power is inconsistent with liberty,....
Irresponsible power is inconsistent with liberty, and must corrupt those who exercise it.-- John Calhoun

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Many a man has finally succeeded....
Many a man has finally succeeded only because he has failed after repeated efforts. If he had never met defeat he would never have known any great victory.-- Orison Swett Marden

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  People often grudge others what they....
People often grudge others what they cannot enjoy themselves.-- Aesop

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Liberty is rendered even more precious....
Liberty is rendered even more precious by the recollection of servitude.-- Cicero

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Any artist should be grateful for....
Any artist should be grateful for a naive grace which puts him beyond the need to reason elaborately.-- Saul Bellow

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Wisdom is not wisdom when it....
Wisdom is not wisdom when it is derived from books alone.-- Horace

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you laid all of the....
If you laid all of the lawyers in the world, end to end, on the equator ---- It would be a good idea to just leave them there.-- Unknown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Anyone who takes himself too seriously....
Anyone who takes himself too seriously always runs the risk of looking ridiculous; anyone who can consistently laugh at himself does not.-- Vaclav Havel

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  SARCOPHAGUS, n. Among the Greeks a....
SARCOPHAGUS, n. Among the Greeks a coffin which being made of a certain kind of carnivorous stone, had the peculiar property of devouring the body placed in it. The sarcophagus known to modern obsequiographers is commonly a product of the carpenter's art.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We are so vain that we....
We are so vain that we even care for the opinion of those we don't care for.-- Marie Ebner von Eschenbach

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nature is trying very hard to....
Nature is trying very hard to make us succeed, but nature does not depend on us. We are not the only experiment-- R. Buckminster Fuller

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  By keenly confronting the enigmas that....
By keenly confronting the enigmas that surround us, and by considering and analysing the observations that I have made, I ended up in the domain of mathematics, Although I am absolutely without training in the exact sciences, I often seem to have more in common with mathematicians than with my fellow artists.-- M. C. Escher

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  They say that women talk too....
They say that women talk too much. If you have worked in congress you know that the filibuster was invented by men.-- Clare Booth Luce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When the president decides something on....
When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday -- no matter what happened Tuesday.-- Stephen Colbert

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A writer is not a confectioner,....
A writer is not a confectioner, a cosmetic dealer, or an entertainer. He is a man who has signed a contract with his conscious and his sense of duty.-- Anton Chekhov

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The wicked flee when no man....
The wicked flee when no man pursueth.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Seek simplicity, and distrust it.-- Alfred....
Seek simplicity, and distrust it.-- Alfred North Whitehead

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I don't really think about anything....
I don't really think about anything too much. I live in the present. I move on. I don't think about what happened yesterday. If I think too much, it kind of freaks me out.-- Pamela Anderson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is a truth universally acknowledged,....
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. However little known the feelings or views of such a man on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of ths surrounding families, that he is considered as the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters.-- Jane Austen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A prince should therefore have no....
A prince should therefore have no other aim or thought, nor take up any other thing for his study but war and it organization and discipline, for that is the only art that is necessary to one who commands.-- Niccolo Machiavelli

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What other people think about me....
What other people think about me is not my business.-- Michael J. Fox

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The basic fact about human existence....
The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What's coming will come and we'll....
What's coming will come and we'll just have to meet it when it does.-- J. K. Rowling

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There is always a well-known solution....
There is always a well-known solution to every human problem--neat, plausible, and wrong.--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The past is but the past....
The past is but the past of a beginning.-- H. G. Wells

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When I consider the small span....
When I consider the small span of my life absorbed in the eternity of all time, or the small part of space which I can touch or see engulfed by the infinite immensity of spaces that I know not and that know me not, I am frightened and astonished to see myself here instead of there... now instead of then.-- Blaise Pascal

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is a bad plan that....
It is a bad plan that admits of no modification.-- Publilius Syrus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ABASEMENT, n. A decent and customary....
ABASEMENT, n. A decent and customary mental attitude in the presence of wealth or power. Peculiarly appropriate in an employee when addressing an employer.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When we are unhurried and wise,....
When we are unhurried and wise, we perceive that only great and worthy things have any permanent and absolute existence, that petty fears and petty pleasures are but the shadow of the reality.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What the superior man seeks is....
What the superior man seeks is in himself. What the mean man seeks is in others.-- Confucius

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Competition is a painful thing, but....
Competition is a painful thing, but it produces great results.-- Jerry Flint

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying....
Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one's country.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nothing succeeds like the appearance of....
Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success.-- Christopher Lasch

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Do not go where the path....
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I know [patriotism] exists, and I....
I know [patriotism] exists, and I know it has done much in the present contest. But a great and lasting war can never be supported on this principle alone. It must be aided by a prospect of interest, or some reward.-- George Washington

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Existence would be intolerable if we....
Existence would be intolerable if we were never to dream.-- Anatole France

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Maybe most people were fundamentally contradictory.....
Maybe most people were fundamentally contradictory. The real people at any rate.-- Tom Robbins

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I simply cannot understand the passion....
I simply cannot understand the passion that some people have for making themselves thoroughly uncomfortable and then boasting about it afterwards.-- Patricia Moyes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Tell me what company you keep....
Tell me what company you keep and I'll tell you what you are.-- Miguel de Cervantes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Stubbornness is also determination. It's simply....
Stubbornness is also determination. It's simply a matter of shifting from "won't power" to "will power."-- Peter McWilliams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Enjoy present pleasures in such a....
Enjoy present pleasures in such a way as not to injure future ones.-- Seneca

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every time one laughs a nail....
Every time one laughs a nail is removed from one's coffin. -- Honduran Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Fools rush in where fools have....
Fools rush in where fools have been before.-- Unknown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Success is not the result of....
Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire.-- Reggie Leach

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Inspiration may be a form of....
Inspiration may be a form of superconsciousness, or perhaps of subconsciousness - I wouldn't know. But I am sure it is the antithesis of self- consciousness.-- Aaron Copland

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I believe that individuals can make....
I believe that individuals can make a difference in society. Since periods of change such as the present one come so rarely in human history, it is up to each of us to make the best use of our time to help create a happier world.-- The Dalai Lama

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It's very easy to feel someone's....
It's very easy to feel someone's pain when you love them.-- Salma Hayek

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Well, you're either lovers or you're....
Well, you're either lovers or you're wanting to be lovers or you're trying not to be lovers so you can be friends, but any way you look at it, sex is always looming in the picture like a shadow, like an undertow.-- Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Death is a very dull, dreary....
Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it.-- W. Somerset Maugham

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Your soul is oftentimes a battlefield,....
Your soul is oftentimes a battlefield, upon which your reason and your judgment wage war against passion and your appetite.-- Kahlil Gibran

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Sometimes creativity is a compulsion, not....
Sometimes creativity is a compulsion, not an ambition.-- Ed Norton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I have found a desire within....
I have found a desire within myself that no experience in this world can satisfy; the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.-- C. S. Lewis

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What greater grief than the loss....
What greater grief than the loss of one's native land.-- Euripides

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Liberals are very broadminded: they are....
Liberals are very broadminded: they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Of all human ills, greatest is....
Of all human ills, greatest is fortune's wayward tyranny.-- Sophocles

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I have always found that angels....
I have always found that angels have the vanity to speak of themselves as the only wise.-- William Blake

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am a friend of the....
I am a friend of the working man, and I would rather be his friend, than be one.-- Clarence Darrow

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The truth. It is a beautiful....
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution.-- J. K. Rowling

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A myth is a religion in....
A myth is a religion in which no one any longer believes.-- James Feibleman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Action to be effective must be....
Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends.-- Jawaharlal Nehru

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We must uphold the promise of....
We must uphold the promise of Roosevelt, Truman, Kennedy, Johnson, Carter, and Clinton and never allow the President and his Republican friends to threaten Social Security by putting it on the Wall Street trading block.-- John Kerry

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Learning to dislike children at an....
Learning to dislike children at an early age saves a lot of expense and aggravation later in life.-- Robert Byrne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I want freedom for the full....
I want freedom for the full expression of my personality.-- Mahatma Gandhi

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Good leadership consists in showing average....
Good leadership consists in showing average people how to do the work of superior people.-- John D. Rockefeller

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There is death in the pot.--....
There is death in the pot.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We are students of words; we....
We are students of words; we are shut up in schools, and colleges, and recitation rooms, for ten or fifteen years, and come out at last with a bag of wind, a memory of words, and do not know a thing-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never face facts; if you do,....
Never face facts; if you do, you'll never get up in the morning.-- Marlo Thomas

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We think very few people sensible,....
We think very few people sensible, except those who are of our opinion.-- Francois De La Rochefoucauld

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  People need to be reminded more....
People need to be reminded more often than they need to be instructed.-- Samuel Johnson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The key to non-anxious sermon-writing is....
The key to non-anxious sermon-writing is that it's not about me. It's about the congregation. I honor the fact that the listeners bring more to the sermon than I do. I remind myself of the hundreds of times someone says, 'I loved how you said…' and then tell me things that they heard that were nowhere in my text and that I never said. But they heard what they needed to hear.-- Reverend Sean Parker Dennison

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We have two ears and one....
We have two ears and one mouth so we may listen more and talk the less.-- Epictetus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All warfare is based on deception.....
All warfare is based on deception. There is no place where espionage is not used. Offer the enemy bait to lure him. -- Sun-Tzu

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A great many people think they....
A great many people think they are thinking when they are really rearranging their prejudices.-- William James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Time is but a stream I....
Time is but a stream I go a-fishing in. I drink at it, but while I drink I see the sandy bottom and detect how shallow it is. Its thin current slides away, but eternity remains.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Heirlooms we don't have in our....
Heirlooms we don't have in our family. But stories we've got.-- Rose Cherin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious,....
Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you're not really losing it. You're just passing it on to someone else.-- Mitch Albom

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A sense of humor is just....
A sense of humor is just common sense dancing.-- Clive James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The cry of equality pulls everyone....
The cry of equality pulls everyone down.-- Iris Murdoch

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Oats. A grain, which in England....
Oats. A grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people.-- Samuel Johnson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Public speaking is very easy.-- Dan....
Public speaking is very easy.-- Dan Quayle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I've grown to realize the joy....
I've grown to realize the joy that comes from little victories is preferable to the fun that comes from ease and the pursuit of pleasure.-- Lawana Blackwell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Prejudice is the Child of Ignorance.--....
Prejudice is the Child of Ignorance.-- William Hazlitt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you don't risk anything you....
If you don't risk anything you risk even more.-- Erica Jong

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  IMPIETY, n. Your irreverence toward my....
IMPIETY, n. Your irreverence toward my deity.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I would rather be exposed to....
I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it.-- Thomas Jefferson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The glory of great men should....
The glory of great men should always be measured by the means they have used to acquire it.-- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Reviewing has one advantage over suicide:....
Reviewing has one advantage over suicide: in suicide you take it out on yourself; in reviewing you take it out on other people.-- George Bernard Shaw

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We spend our years as a....
We spend our years as a tale that is told.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ABATIS, n. Rubbish in front of....
ABATIS, n. Rubbish in front of a fort, to prevent the rubbish outside from molesting the rubbish inside.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What if no one's watching? What....
What if no one's watching? What if when we're dead we are just dead?-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Oh, my friend, it's not what....
Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. It's what you do with what you have left.-- Hubert H. Humphrey

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He who would travel happily must....
He who would travel happily must travel light. -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If we aren't capable of being....
If we aren't capable of being hurt we aren't capable of feeling joy.-- Madeleine L'Engle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He loved humankind dearly and with....
He loved humankind dearly and with all his heart, but he disliked most human beings.-- David Guterson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The agenda of the roadblock is....
The agenda of the roadblock is the philosophy of the stop sign.-- George W. Bush

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The world makes you into a....
The world makes you into a bitch, no matter how quietly you go, so you may as well go kicking and screaming.-- Roseanne Barr

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Do not seek to follow in....
Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of the men of old; seek what they sought. -- Matsuo Basho

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am still determined to be....
I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.-- Martha Washington

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Now I see the secret of....
Now I see the secret of the making of the best persons.-- Walt_Whitman/"

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The greatest paradox of them all....
The greatest paradox of them all is to speak of "civilized warfare."-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Flying may not be all plain....
Flying may not be all plain sailing, but the fun of it is worth the price.-- Amelia Earhart

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Just because your voice reaches halfway....
Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.-- Edward R. Murrow

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Charm is a way of getting....
Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question.-- Albert Camus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I was so naive as a....
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.-- Johnny Carson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  But did thee feel the earth....
But did thee feel the earth move?-- Ernest Hemingway

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Of course the game is rigged.....
Of course the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you--if you don't play, you can't win.-- Robert Heinlein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Our imagination is the only limit....
Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future.-- Charles F. Kettering

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Be slow in choosing a friend,....
Be slow in choosing a friend, slower in changing. -- Benjamin Franklin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  For a list of all the....
For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three.-- Alice Kahn

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow....
RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the affairs of to-day.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He was a genius - that....
He was a genius - that is to say, a man who does superlatively and without obvious effort something that most people cannot do by the uttermost exertion of their abilities.-- Robertson Davies

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  God put me on this earth....
God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.-- Bill Watterson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Bisexuality automatically doubles your chances for....
Bisexuality automatically doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.-- Woody Allen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I can be expected to look....
I can be expected to look for truth but not to find it.-- Denis Diderot

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is a kind of spiritual....
It is a kind of spiritual snobbery that makes people think they can be happy without money.-- Albert Camus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If men want to oppose war,....
If men want to oppose war, it is *statism* that they must oppose.-- Ayn Rand

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The most terrible poverty is loneliness....
The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.-- Mother Teresa

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Begin at the beginning and go....
Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end: then stop.-- Lewis Carroll

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Laughter is not at all a....
Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship; and it is by far the best ending for one.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Experience: that most brutal of teachers.....
Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn.-- C. S. Lewis

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Love is being stupid together.-- Paul....
Love is being stupid together.-- Paul Valery

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Gossip needs no carriage.-- Russian Proverb....
Gossip needs no carriage.-- Russian Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When desire, having rejected reason and....
When desire, having rejected reason and overpowered judgment which leads to right, is set in the direction of the pleasure which beauty can inspire . . .-- Socrates

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  They were so strong in their....
They were so strong in their beliefs that there came a time when it hardly mattered what exactly those beliefs were; they all fused into a single stubbornness.-- Louise Erdrich

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Like the wind crying endlessly through....
Like the wind crying endlessly through the universe, Time carries away the names and the deeds of conquerors and commoners alike. And all that we are, all that remains, is in the memories of those who cared we came this way for a brief moment.-- Harlan Ellison

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Health food makes me sick.-- Calvin....
Health food makes me sick.-- Calvin Trillin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Things may come to those who....
Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.-- Abraham Lincoln

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What we call our despair is....
What we call our despair is often only the painful eagerness of unfed hope.-- George Eliot

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  By learning to discover and value....
By learning to discover and value our ordinariness, we nurture a friendliness toward ourselves and the world that is the essence of a healthy soul.-- Thomas Moore

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Change is the law of life;....
Change is the law of life; and those who look only to the past or the present are certain to miss the future.-- John F. Kennedy

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He that can heroically endure adversity....
He that can heroically endure adversity will bear prosperity with equal greatness of the soul; for the mind that cannot be dejected by the former is not likely to be transported without the latter.-- Henry Fielding

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In everyone's life, at some time,....
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.-- Albert Schweitzer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  PITIFUL, adj. The state of an....
PITIFUL, adj. The state of an enemy of opponent after an imaginary encounter with oneself.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The only way to get rid....
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Resist it, and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  [Water is] the only drink for....
[Water is] the only drink for a wise man.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Civilizations die from suicide, not by....
Civilizations die from suicide, not by murder.-- Arnold Toynbee

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No one forgives with more grace....
No one forgives with more grace and love than a child.-- Real Live Preacher

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Management is doing things right; leadership....
Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.-- Peter Drucker

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Doubt is part of all religion.....
Doubt is part of all religion. All the religious thinkers were doubters.-- Isaac Bashevis Singer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Money cannot buy health, but I'd....
Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.-- Dorothy Parker

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The citizen who criticizes his country....
The citizen who criticizes his country is paying it an implied tribute.-- J. William Fulbright

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Science can be introduced to children....
Science can be introduced to children well or poorly. If poorly, children can be turned away from science; they can develop a lifelong antipathy; they will be in a far worse condition than if they had never been introduced to science at all.-- Isaac Asimov

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Faith may be defined briefly as....
Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The great thing in this world....
The great thing in this world is not so much where we are, but in what direction we are moving.-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am a Marxist--of the Groucho....
I am a Marxist--of the Groucho tendency.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I can't understand why people are....
I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones.-- John Cage

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Before you contradict an old man,....
Before you contradict an old man, my fair friend, you should endeavor to understand him.-- George Santayana

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What you do not want done....
What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.-- Confucius

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is necessary to work, if....
It is necessary to work, if not from inclination, at least from despair. Everything considered, work is less boring than amusing oneself.-- Charles Baudelaire

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It's a sure sign of summer....
It's a sure sign of summer if the chair gets up when you do.-- Walter Winchell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In great attempts it is glorious....
In great attempts it is glorious even to fail.-- Vince Lombardi

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There cannot be a crisis next....
There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.-- Henry Kissinger

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We can't take any credit for....
We can't take any credit for our talents. It's how we use them that counts.-- Madeleine L'Engle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but....
Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself.-- Roseanne Barr

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of....
Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The crux... is that the vast....
The crux... is that the vast majority of the mass of the universe seems to be missing.-- William J. Broad

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Of men who have a sense....
Of men who have a sense of honor, more come through alive than are slain, but from those who flee comes neither glory nor any help.-- Homer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Everyone believes very easily whatever they....
Everyone believes very easily whatever they fear or desire.-- Jean de La Fontaine

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Be of good cheer: it is....
Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I first saw President Reagan as....
I first saw President Reagan as a foot, highly polished brown cordovan wagging merrily on a hassock. I spied it through the door. It was a beautiful foot, sleek. Such casual elegance and clean lines! But not a big foot, not formidable, maybe a little ...frail. I imagined cradling it in my arms, protecting it from unsmooth roads.-- Peggy Noonan

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Do not speak of repulsive matters....
Do not speak of repulsive matters at table.-- Amy Vanderbilt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Viewed from the summit of reason,....
Viewed from the summit of reason, all life looks like a malignant disease and the world like a madhouse.-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We must make the world honest....
We must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.-- George Bernard Shaw

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Through faith man experiences the meaning....
Through faith man experiences the meaning of the world; through action he is to give to it meaning.-- Leo Braeck

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  APRIL FOOL, n. The March fool....
APRIL FOOL, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  MORE, adj. The comparative degree of....
MORE, adj. The comparative degree of too much.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  My favorite thing is to go....
My favorite thing is to go where I've never been.-- Diane Arbus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There is no pleasure in having....
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.-- Mary Wilson Little

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The mere sense of living is....
The mere sense of living is joy enough.-- Emily Dickinson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It has all been very interesting.--....
It has all been very interesting.-- Lady Mary Wortley Montagu

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We have placed too much hope....
We have placed too much hope in political and social reforms, only to find out that we were being deprived of our most precious possession: our spiritual life.-- Alexander Solzhenitsyn

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Whose woods these are I think....
Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow.-- Robert Frost

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Wisdom is the right use of....
Wisdom is the right use of knowledge. To know is not to be wise. Many men know a great deal, and are all the greater fools for it. There is no fool so great a fool as a knowing fool. But to know how to use knowledge is to have wisdom.-- Charles Haddon Spurgeon

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ...obstacles do not exist to be....
...obstacles do not exist to be surrendered to, but only to be broken.-- Adolf Hitler

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ENTERTAINMENT, n. Any kind of amusement....
ENTERTAINMENT, n. Any kind of amusement whose inroads stop short of death by injection.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The oppressed are allowed once every....
The oppressed are allowed once every few years to decide which particular representatives of the oppressing class are to represent and repress them.-- Karl Marx

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I think people that have a....
I think people that have a brother or sister don't realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there's always somebody there, somebody that's family.-- Trey Parker and Matt Stone

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Common sense is not so common.--....
Common sense is not so common.-- Voltaire

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Tomatoes and oregano make it Italian;....
Tomatoes and oregano make it Italian; wine and tarragon make it French. Sour cream makes it Russian; lemon and cinnamon make it Greek. Soy sauce makes it Chinese; garlic makes it good.-- Alice May Brock

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You don't like your job, you....
You don't like your job, you don't strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.-- Matt Groening

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The true mystery of the world....
The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The world is my country, all....
The world is my country, all mankind are my brethren, and to do good is my religion.-- Thomas Paine

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The laborer is worthy of his....
The laborer is worthy of his reward.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Dolendi modus, timendi non item.-- Sir_Francis_Bacon/"....
Dolendi modus, timendi non item.-- Sir_Francis_Bacon/"

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Dancing is a contact sport. Football....
Dancing is a contact sport. Football is a hitting sport.-- Vince Lombardi

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I believe in censorship. I made....
I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.-- Mae West

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He is a benefactor of mankind....
He is a benefactor of mankind who contracts the great rules of life into short sentences, that may be easily impressed on the memory, and so recur habitually to the mind.-- Samuel Johnson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nothing is more like a wise....
Nothing is more like a wise man than a fool who holds his tongue. -- Saint Francis de Sales

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ...when you have eliminated the impossible,....
...when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.-- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I think and think for months....
I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right.-- Albert Einstein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Perhaps too much of everything is....
Perhaps too much of everything is as bad as too little.-- Edna Ferber

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The community stagnates without the impulse....
The community stagnates without the impulse of the individual. The impulse dies away without the sympathy of the community.-- William James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  RESPOND, v.i. To make answer, or....
RESPOND, v.i. To make answer, or disclose otherwise a consciousness of having inspired an interest in what Herbert Spencer calls "external coexistences," as Satan "squat like a toad" at the ear of Eve, responded to the touch of the angel's spear. To respond in damages is to contribute to the maintenance of the plaintiff's attorney and, incidentally, to the gratification of the plaintiff.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Yesterday, December 7, 1941 - a....
Yesterday, December 7, 1941 - a date which will live on in infamy - the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan.-- Franklin D. Roosevelt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The kind of beauty I want....
The kind of beauty I want most is the hard-to-get kind that comes from within - strength, courage, dignity.-- Ruby Dee

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When I was one-and-twenty,-- Unknown (can....
When I was one-and-twenty,-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You have to be realistic about....
You have to be realistic about terrorism. Certain groups of people, certain groups, Muslim fundamentalists, Christian fundamentalists, Jewish fundamentalists, and just plain guys from Montana, are going to continue to make life in this country very interesting for a long, long time.-- George Carlin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I wish you sunshine on your....
I wish you sunshine on your path and storms to season your journey. I wish you peace in the world in which you live... More I cannot wish you except perhaps love to make all the rest worthwhile.-- Robert A. Ward

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  ACADEME, n. An ancient school where....
ACADEME, n. An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Everything terrible is something that needs....
Everything terrible is something that needs our love.-- Rainer Maria Rilke

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I would rather try to persuade....
I would rather try to persuade a man to go along, because once I have persuaded him he will stick. If I scare him, he will stay just as long as he is scared, and then he is gone.-- Dwight D. Eisenhower

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Perhaps I am a bear, or....
Perhaps I am a bear, or some hibernating animal underneath, for the instinct to be half asleep all winter is so strong in me.-- Anne Morrow Lindbergh

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The right to vote is a....
The right to vote is a *consequence*, not a primary cause, of a free social system -- and its value depends on the constitutional structure implementing and strictly delimiting the voters' power; unlimited majority rule is an instance of the principle of tyranny.-- Ayn Rand

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is a curious thing... that....
It is a curious thing... that every creed promises a paradise which will be absolutely uninhabitable for anyone of civilized taste.-- Evelyn Waugh

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The personal, if it is deep....
The personal, if it is deep enough, becomes universal, mythical, symbolic.-- Anais Nin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One that would have the fruit....
One that would have the fruit must climb the tree.-- Thomas Fuller

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The stoical scheme of supplying our....
The stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires, is like cutting off our feet when we want shoes.-- Jonathan Swift

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Happy are the people whose annals....
Happy are the people whose annals are blank in history books-- Thomas Carlyle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When you leave college, there are....
When you leave college, there are thousands of people out there with the same degree you have; when you get a job, there will be thousands of people doing what you want to do for a living. But you are the only person alive who has sole custody of your life.-- Anna Quindlen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I love you the more that....
I love you the more that I believe you have liked me for my own sake and for nothing else.-- John Keats

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  True writers have a lot more....
True writers have a lot more invested in the way they've written their books than in what those books happen to be about.-- Po Bronson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Cherish all your happy moments; they....
Cherish all your happy moments; they make a fine cushion for old age.-- Booth Tarkington

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One person with a belief is....
One person with a belief is equal to a force of 99 who have only interests.-- John Stuart Mill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A still, small voice.-- Bible ....
A still, small voice.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We are opening up an enormous....
We are opening up an enormous new era in archaeology. Time capsules in the deep oceans.-- John Lehman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  She got her looks from her....
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.-- Groucho Marx

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A composer is a guy who....
A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.-- Frank Zappa

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Bite off more than you can....
Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it. Plan more than you can do, then do it.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One cannot fix one's eyes on....
One cannot fix one's eyes on the commonest natural production without finding food for a rambling fancy.-- Jane Austen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Abundance is, in large part, an....
Abundance is, in large part, an attitude.-- Sue Patton Thoele

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you would win a man....
If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend.-- Abraham Lincoln

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you have to have your....
If you have to have your weapon, at least run it through the grandma test. Take the weapon and hit your grandma with it. If she dies or writes you out of the will, don't bring it!-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every now and then when your....
Every now and then when your life gets complicated and the weasels start closing in, the only cure is to load up on heinous chemicals and then drive like a bastard from Hollywood to Las Vegas ... with the music at top volume and at least a pint of ether.-- Hunter S. Thompson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He who cannot be a good....
He who cannot be a good follower cannot be a good leader.-- Aristotle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is only prudent never to....
It is only prudent never to place complete confidence in that by which we have even once been deceived.-- Rene Descartes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Fashion is a form of ugliness....
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The greatest remedy for anger is....
The greatest remedy for anger is delay.-- Seneca

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He had a big head and....
He had a big head and a face so ugly it became almost fascinating.-- Ayn Rand

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Many a man's reputation would not....
Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.-- Elbert Hubbard

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A man has no more character....
A man has no more character than he can command in a time of crisis.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You have to allow a certain....
You have to allow a certain amount of time in which you are doing nothing in order to have things occur to you, to let your mind think.-- Mortimer Adler

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You teach best what you most....
You teach best what you most need to learn.-- Richard Bach

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Truth is the only safe ground....
Truth is the only safe ground to stand upon.-- Elizabeth Cady Stanton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Anger is a wind which blows....
Anger is a wind which blows out the lamp of the mind.-- Robert Ingersoll

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Virtue extends our days: he live....
Virtue extends our days: he live two lives who relives his past with pleasure.-- Marcus Valerius Martialis

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You should pray for a sound....
You should pray for a sound mind in a sound body.-- Juvenal

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Who could follow Carson? Well, believe....
Who could follow Carson? Well, believe me, somebody can - and will.-- Johnny Carson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you want success, then don't....
If you want success, then don't rely on other people to do what YOU can do!-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I love you, not only for....
I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. -- Roy Croft

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I spend almost as much time....
I spend almost as much time figuring out what's wrong with my computer as I do actually using it.-- Clifford Stoll

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Recommend to your children virtue; that....
Recommend to your children virtue; that alone can make them happy, not gold.-- Ludwig van Beethoven

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Normal is getting dressed in clothes....
Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.-- Ellen Goodman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Everywhere I go I find a....
Everywhere I go I find a poet has been there before me.-- Sigmund Freud

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The wit makes fun of other....
The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself, but in so doing, he identifies himself with people--that is, people everywhere, not for the purpose of taking them apart, but simply revealing their true nature.-- James Thurber

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  "Well, now, hold onta yer horses,....
"Well, now, hold onta yer horses, there, Frazier. I mean, as a psychiatrist, isn't it your job to, uh, `seek and uphold the truth'?"-- Cheers

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I'm astounded by people who want....
I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.-- Woody Allen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you want a quality, act....
If you want a quality, act as if you already had it.-- William James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The Greeks invented logic but were....
The Greeks invented logic but were not fooled by it.-- Eric Hoffer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you think nobody cares if....
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.-- Earl Wilson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We are the people our parents....
We are the people our parents warned us about.-- Jimmy Buffett

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Be wiser than other people, if....
Be wiser than other people, if you can, but do not tell them so. -- Lord Chesterfield

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The cosmos is a gigantic flywheel....
The cosmos is a gigantic flywheel making 10,000 revolutions per minute. Man is a sick fly taking a dizzy ride on it.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The smallest good deed is better....
The smallest good deed is better than the grandest intention.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  With reasonable men I will reason;....
With reasonable men I will reason; with humane men I will plea; but to tyrants I will give no quarter, nor waste arguments where they will certainly be lost.-- William Lloyd Garrison

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If people bring so much courage....
If people bring so much courage to this world the world has to kill them to break them, so of course it kills them. The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.-- Ernest Hemingway

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.

Google Video of the Day

Courtesy of Video.KiTT.NeT


Description
A collection of the best and most witty quotations in the world. I hope you enjoy my collection. Please bookmark this page and check back soon as it is updated every other hour! Subscribe for more fun!

Brought to You in League With...

UKRifter Virtual Reality
UKRifter Virtual Reality News from the world of Oculus,
HTC Vive, Razer HDK & Playstation VR. Subscribe today!



Previous Posts
[The television is] an invention that....
[The television is] an invention that....
[The superior man] acts before he....
Would that the Roman people had....
[He was] a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious....
[Optimism is] the obstinacy of maintaining....
Neither a borrower nor a lender....
[When asked what was the proper....
Separate together in a bunch. [And....
The ultimate good desired is better....

Archives
October 2006 / November 2006 / December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 / September 2007 / October 2007 / November 2007 / December 2007 / January 2008 / February 2008 / March 2008 / April 2008 / May 2008 / June 2008 / November 2008 / December 2008 / January 2009 / February 2009 / March 2009 / April 2009 / May 2009 / June 2009 / July 2009 / August 2009 / September 2009 / October 2009 / November 2009 / December 2009 / January 2010 / February 2010 / March 2010 / April 2010 / May 2010 / June 2010 / July 2010 / August 2010 / September 2010 / October 2010 / November 2010 / December 2010 / January 2011 / February 2011 / March 2011 / April 2011 / May 2011 / June 2011 / July 2011 / August 2011 / September 2011 / October 2011 / November 2011 / December 2011 / January 2012 / February 2012 / March 2012 / April 2012 / May 2012 / June 2012 / July 2012 / August 2012 / September 2012 / October 2012 / November 2012 / December 2012 /

Twitter Facebook
MySpace Digg
Hit a button to share with your friends

Powered by Blogger