Famous Quotes from Inspirational People

  I happen to feel that the....
I happen to feel that the degree of a person's intelligence is directly reflected by the number of conflicting attitudes she can bring to bear on the same topic.-- Lisa Alther

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is true that I was....
It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can't speak for my twin sister.-- Abigail Van Buren

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I don't believe in a government....
I don't believe in a government that protects us from ourselves.-- Ronald Reagan

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Heaven is such that all who....
Heaven is such that all who have lived well, of whatever religion, have a place there.-- Emanuel Swedenborg

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Some people make things happen, some....
Some people make things happen, some watch while things happen, and some wonder 'What happened?'-- Unknown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  CIRCUS, n. A place where horses,....
CIRCUS, n. A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A thing is not proved just....
A thing is not proved just because no one has ever questioned it. What has never been gone into impartially has never been properly gone into. Hence scepticism is the first step toward truth. It must be applied generally, because it is the touchstone.-- Denis Diderot

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never raise your hand to your....
Never raise your hand to your children; it leaves your midsection unprotected.-- Robert Orben

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All war is a symptom of....
All war is a symptom of man's failure as a thinking animal.-- John Steinbeck

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  My father and he had one....
My father and he had one of those English friendships which begin by avoiding intimacies and eventually eliminate speech altogether.-- Jorge Luis Borges

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He was one of those men....
He was one of those men who think that the world can be saved by writing a pamphlet.-- Benjamin Disraeli

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you bow at all, bow....
If you bow at all, bow low.-- Chinese Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No one goes there nowadays, it's....
No one goes there nowadays, it's too crowded.-- Yogi Berra

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Philosophers say a great deal about....
Philosophers say a great deal about what is absolutely necessary for science, and it is always, so far as one can see, rather naive, and probably wrong.-- Richard Feynman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The greatest discovery of my generation....
The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes of mind.-- William James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The finest words in the world....
The finest words in the world are only vain sounds if you cannot understand them.-- Anatole France

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Plain women know more about men....
Plain women know more about men than beautiful ones do.-- Katharine Hepburn

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Archaeology is not only the hand....
Archaeology is not only the hand maid of history, it is also the conservator of art.-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When love and skill work together,....
When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece.-- John Ruskin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Well begun is half done.-- Aristotle....
Well begun is half done.-- Aristotle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Morality, like art, means drawing a....
Morality, like art, means drawing a line someplace.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Too little liberty brings stagnation and....
Too little liberty brings stagnation and too much brings chaos.-- Bertrand Russell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Hold a book in your hand....
Hold a book in your hand and you're a pilgrim at the gates of a new city.-- Anne Michaels

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Behold the Lamb of God, which....
Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world!-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He talked with more claret than....
He talked with more claret than clarity.-- Susan Ertz

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  O ye of little faith, who....
O ye of little faith, who believe that somehow the birth of Christ is dependent upon acknowledgment in a circular from OfficeMax!-- Anna Quindlen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  An artist does not fake reality--he....
An artist does not fake reality--he *stylizes* it.-- Ayn Rand

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What’s the use of happiness? It....
What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.-- Henny Youngman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Most women set out to try....
Most women set out to try to change a man, and when they have changed him they don't like him.-- Marlene Dietrich

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Philosophy, n. A route of many....
Philosophy, n. A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A man is as old as....
A man is as old as he feels himself to be.-- English Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The young have aspirations that never....
The young have aspirations that never come to pass, the old have reminiscences of what never happened.-- Saki

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nothing to me is more distasteful....
Nothing to me is more distasteful than that entire complacency and satisfaction which beam in the countenances of a newly married couple.-- Charles Lamb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every journalist has a novel in....
Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.-- Russel Lynes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is dangerous to be right....
It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong.-- Voltaire

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The mind ought sometimes to be....
The mind ought sometimes to be diverted that it may return the better to thinking.-- Phaedrus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If all the rich people in....
If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves there wouldn't be enough to go around.-- Christina Stead

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He who knows that enough is....
He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.-- Lao-Tzu

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Health is worth more than learning.--....
Health is worth more than learning.-- Thomas Jefferson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There are two sides to every....
There are two sides to every question.-- Protagoras

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It comes from saying no to....
It comes from saying no to 1,000 things to make sure we don't get on the wrong track or try to do too much.-- Steve Jobs

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Destiny is a name often given....
Destiny is a name often given in retrospect to choices that had dramatic consequences.-- J. K. Rowling

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nature is not affected by finance.....
Nature is not affected by finance. If someone offered you ten thousand dollars to let them touch your eyeball without blinking, you would never collect the money. At the very last moment, Nature would force you to blink your eye. Nature will protect her own.-- Dick Gregory

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The world belongs to the Enthusiast....
The world belongs to the Enthusiast who keeps cool.-- William McFee

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  An orator is a good man....
An orator is a good man who is skilled in speaking.-- Cato the Elder

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  But already it is time to....
But already it is time to depart, for me to die, for you to go on living; which of us takes the better course, is concealed from anyone except God.-- Socrates

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  [Spring is] when life's alive in....
[Spring is] when life's alive in everything.-- Christina Rossetti

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Do not trust all men, but....
Do not trust all men, but trust men of worth; the former course is silly, the latter a mark of prudence.-- Democritus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Desperate affairs require desperate remedies.-- Horatio....
Desperate affairs require desperate remedies.-- Horatio Nelson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Having a dream is what keeps....
Having a dream is what keeps you alive. Overcoming the challenges make life worth living.-- Mary Tyler Moore

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Another one of them new worlds.--....
Another one of them new worlds.--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Be wary of the man who....
Be wary of the man who urges an action in which he himself incurs no risk.-- Joaquin Setanti

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A lot of people mistake a....
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.-- Doug Larson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Literature is an occupation in which....
Literature is an occupation in which you have to keep proving your talent to people who have none.-- Jules Renard

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Life-transforming ideas have always come to....
Life-transforming ideas have always come to me through books.-- Bell Hooks

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Statistician: A man who believes figures....
Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits that under analysis some of them won't stand up either.-- Evan Esar

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Whenever you find a man who....
Whenever you find a man who says he doesn't believe in a real Right and Wrong, you will find the same man going back on this a moment later.-- C. S. Lewis

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If the only prayer you ever....
If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is "thank you," that would suffice.-- Meister Eckhart

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Mothers are a biological necessity; fathers....
Mothers are a biological necessity; fathers are a social invention.-- Margaret Mead

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Alexander received more bravery of mind....
Alexander received more bravery of mind by the pattern of Achilles, than by hearing the definition of fortitude.-- Sir Philip Sidney

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Make voyages! - Attempt them! -....
Make voyages! - Attempt them! - there's nothing else...-- Tennessee Williams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  RAILROAD, n. The chief of many....
RAILROAD, n. The chief of many mechanical devices enabling us to get away from where we are to wher we are no better off. For this purpose the railroad is held in highest favor by the optimist, for it permits him to make the transit with great expedition.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What a joy, that literacy is....
What a joy, that literacy is no longer prima facie evidence of treason.-- John Steinbeck

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You need chaos in your soul....
You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star.-- Friedrich Nietzsche

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In the modern world of business,....
In the modern world of business, it is useless to be a creative original thinker unless you can also sell what you create. Management cannot be expected to recognize a good idea unless it is presented to them by a good salesman.-- David M. Ogilvy

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Stranger, if you passing meet me....
Stranger, if you passing meet me and desire to speak to me, why should you not speak to me? And why should I not speak to you?-- Walt Whitman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Pride grows in the human heart....
Pride grows in the human heart like lard on a pig.-- Alexander Solzhenitsyn

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If all economists were laid end....
If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.-- George Bernard Shaw

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You gain strength, courage and confidence....
You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do.-- Eleanor Roosevelt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  RESPECTABILITY, n. The offspring of a....
RESPECTABILITY, n. The offspring of a _liaison_ between a bald head and a bank account.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There are only two ways to....
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is.-- Albert Einstein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  By whom?-- Dorothy Parker ....
By whom?-- Dorothy Parker

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The more sand that has escaped....
The more sand that has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it.-- Jean-Paul Sartre

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In the right light, at the....
In the right light, at the right time, everything is extraordinary.-- Wendy Magruder

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Talent does what it can, Genius....
Talent does what it can, Genius does what it must.-- Edward Bulwer-Lytton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Our friendships are precious, not only....
Our friendships are precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life;and thanks to a benevolent arrangement of things, the greater part is sunshine.-- Thomas Jefferson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The basis of optimism is sheer....
The basis of optimism is sheer terror.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I think that God in creating....
I think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All progress is precarious, and the....
All progress is precarious, and the solution of one problem brings us face to face with another problem.-- Martin Luther King Jr.

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All ambitions are lawful except those....
All ambitions are lawful except those that climb upward on the miseries or credulities of mankind.-- Joseph Conrad

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There's no business like show business.--....
There's no business like show business.-- Irving Berlin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When a thing is funny, search....
When a thing is funny, search it carefully for a hidden truth.-- George Bernard Shaw

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The most beautiful thing we can....
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.-- Albert Einstein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Our inventions are wont to be....
Our inventions are wont to be pretty toys, which distract our attention from serious things. They are but improved means to an unimproved end.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No one appreciates the very special....
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversations as a dog does. -- Christopher Morley

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is fun to be in....
It is fun to be in the same decade with you.-- Franklin D. Roosevelt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All the king's horses and all....
All the king's horses and all the king's men can't put the past together again. So let's remember: Don't try to saw sawdust.-- Dale Carnegie

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I disapprove of what you say,....
I disapprove of what you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it.-- Voltaire

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is characteristic of the military....
It is characteristic of the military mentality that nonhuman factors (atom bombs, strategic bases, weapons of all sorts, the possession of raw materials, etc) are held essential, while the human being, his desires, and thoughts - in short, the psychological factors - are considered as unimportant and secondary...The individual is degraded...to "human materiel".-- Albert Einstein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The paths of glory at least....
The paths of glory at least lead to the grave, but the paths of duty may not get you any where.-- James Thurber

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  To a woman the first kiss....
To a woman the first kiss is just the end of the beginning but to a man it is the beginning of the end.-- Helen Rowland

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What people call insincerity is simply....
What people call insincerity is simply a method by which we can multiply our personalities.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  TALK, v.t. To commit an indiscretion....
TALK, v.t. To commit an indiscretion without temptation, from an impulse without purpose.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The long habit of living indisposeth....
The long habit of living indisposeth us for dying.-- Sir Thomas Browne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Everyone wants to be Cary Grant.....
Everyone wants to be Cary Grant. Even I want to be Cary Grant.-- Cary Grant

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Go to other people's funerals or....
Go to other people's funerals or they won't come to yours.-- Yogi Berra

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Neither a borrower nor a lender....
Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend; And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry [economy].-- William Shakespeare

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  An artist does not fake reality--he....
An artist does not fake reality--he *stylizes* it.-- Ayn Rand

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Hate the sin, love the sinner.--....
Hate the sin, love the sinner.-- Mahatma Gandhi

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  My future starts when I wake....
My future starts when I wake up every morning... Every day I find something creative to do with my life.-- Miles Davis

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I had that familiar conviction that....
I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer.-- F. Scott Fitzgerald

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is not a lucky word,....
It is not a lucky word, this name "impossible"; no good comes of those who have it so often in their mouths.-- Thomas Carlyle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I was brought up in that....
I was brought up in that other service; but I knew from the first that the Devil was my natural master and captain and friend. I saw that he was in the right, and that the world cringed to his conqueror only from fear.-- George Bernard Shaw

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No man, for any considerable period,....
No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be true.-- Nathaniel Hawthorne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The self is not something ready-made,....
The self is not something ready-made, but something in continuous formation through choice of action.-- John Dewey

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every man is the architect of....
Every man is the architect of his own fortune.-- Sallust

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A classic is a book that....
A classic is a book that doesn't have to be written again. -- W. E. B. du Bois

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I believe that banking institutions are....
I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around [the banks] will deprive the people of all property until their children wake-up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered. The issuing power should be taken from the banks and restored to the people, to whom it properly belongs.-- Thomas Jefferson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I cannot and will not recant....
I cannot and will not recant anything, for to go against conscience is neither right nor safe. Here I stand, I can do no other. God help me. Amen.-- Martin Luther

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Let your life be a counter....
Let your life be a counter friction to stop the machine.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Trust yourself. Think for yourself. Act....
Trust yourself. Think for yourself. Act for yourself. Speak for yourself. Be yourself. Imitation is suicide.-- Marva Collins

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The whole secret of life is....
The whole secret of life is to be interested in one thing profoundly and in a thousand things well.-- Horace Walpole

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you think you can do....
If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right.-- Henry Ford

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The fundamental qualities for good execution....
The fundamental qualities for good execution of a plan is first; intelligence; then discernment and judgment, which enable one to recognize the best method as to attain it; the singleness of purpose; and, lastly, what is most essential of all, will-stubborn will.-- Ferdinand Foch

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The future is a hundred thousand....
The future is a hundred thousand threads, but the past is a fabric that can never be rewoven.-- Orson Scott Card

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He that climbs the tall tree....
He that climbs the tall tree has won right to the fruit.-- Sir Walter Scott

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Fortune does not change men, it....
Fortune does not change men, it unmasks them.-- Suzanne Necker

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never trust the advice of a....
Never trust the advice of a man in difficulties.-- Aesop

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am in earnest; I will....
I am in earnest; I will not equivocate; I will not excuse; I will not retreat a single inch; and I will be heard.-- William Lloyd Garrison

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Ideas are like rabbits. You get....
Ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple and learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a dozen.-- John Steinbeck

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the....
Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off.-- Ellen DeGeneres

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Silence is golden when you can't....
Silence is golden when you can't think of a good answer.-- Muhammad Ali

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The best part about being my....
The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out. Sure, there's a lot more living to go, but there isn't much doubt that I'll always be the 'Dilbert guy.' Unless I go on a crime spree, in which case I'll be 'that stabbin' Dilbert guy.'-- Scott Adams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In youth we learn; in age....
In youth we learn; in age we understand.-- Marie Ebner von Eschenbach

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One who condones evils is just....
One who condones evils is just as guilty as the one who perpetrates it.-- Martin Luther King Jr.

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He drew a circle that shut....
He drew a circle that shut me out ----

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The real voyage of discovery consists....
The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.-- Marcel Proust

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A pessimist is one who makes....
A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties.-- Harry S Truman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I went to the woods because....
I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I look at ordinary people in....
I look at ordinary people in their suits, them with no scars, and I'm different. I don't fit with them. I'm where everybody's got scar tissue on their eyes and got noses like saddles. I go to conventions of old fighters like me and I see the scar tissue and all them flat noses and it's beautiful. Galento, may he r3est in peace. Giardello, LaMotta, Carmen Basilio. What a sweetheart Basilio is. They talk like me, like they got rocks in their throats. Beautiful!-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We cannot deny the facts of....
We cannot deny the facts of nature, but we should certainly try to improve on them.-- Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In the land of the blind,....
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king. -- Desiderius_Erasmus/"

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I have always felt that a....
I have always felt that a politician is to be judged by the animosities he excites among his opponents.-- Sir Winston Churchill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The face is the mirror of....
The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart.-- Saint Jerome

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Computers can figure out all kinds....
Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up.-- James Magary

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Liberty is not a means to....
Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end.-- Lord Acton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Not by age but by capacity....
Not by age but by capacity is wisdom acquired.-- Titus Maccius Plautus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We shall not cease from our....
We shall not cease from our exploration--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is inaccurate to say that....
It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  RESTITUTOR, n. Benefactor; philanthropist.-- Ambrose Bierce....
RESTITUTOR, n. Benefactor; philanthropist.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If mankind minus one were of....
If mankind minus one were of one opinion, then mankind is no more justified in silencing the one than the one - if he had the power - would be justified in silencing mankind.-- John Stuart Mill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every creature is better alive than....
Every creature is better alive than dead, men and moose and pine trees, and he who understands it aright will rather preserve its life than destroy it.-- Henry David Thoreau

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No man is allowed to be....
No man is allowed to be a judge in his own cause, because his interest would certainly bias his judgment, and, not improbably, corrupt his integrity. With equal, nay with greater reason, a body of men are unfit to be both judges and parties at the same time.-- James Madison

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  COMMENDATION, n. The tribute that we....
COMMENDATION, n. The tribute that we pay to achievements that resembles, but do not equal, our own.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I always have a quotation for....
I always have a quotation for everything, it saves original thinking.-- Dorothy L. Sayers

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I take my wife everywhere, but....
I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.-- Henny Youngman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The determined scholar and the man....
The determined scholar and the man of virtue will not seek to live at the expense of injuring their virtue. They will even sacrifice their lives to preserve their virtue complete.-- Confucius

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The meek shall inherit the earth?....
The meek shall inherit the earth? Well... I don't think so. If by meek you mean friendly and introverted, okay maybe, but if by meek you mean unwilling to take a chance, then never. If I was a betting man and I had to wager on who I thought would inherit the earth, my money would be on the curious.-- Jim Coudal

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A hero is one who does....
A hero is one who does what he can. The others don't.-- Romain Rolland

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every day brings a chance for....
Every day brings a chance for you to draw in a breath, kick off your shoes, and dance.-- Oprah Winfrey

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  PALMISTRY, n. The 947th method (according....
PALMISTRY, n. The 947th method (according to Mimbleshaw's classification) of obtaining money by false pretences. It consists in "reading character" in the wrinkles made by closing the hand. The pretence is not altogether false; character can really be read very accurately in this way, for the wrinkles in every hand submitted plainly spell the word "dupe." The imposture consists in not reading it aloud.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  On the mountains of truth you....
On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow.-- Friedrich Nietzsche

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am returning this otherwise good....
I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.-- An English Professor

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  As the old proverb says "Like....
As the old proverb says "Like readily consorts with like."-- Cicero

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The forceps of our minds are....
The forceps of our minds are clumsy forceps, and crush the truth a little in taking hold of it.-- H. G. Wells

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We all live in the protection....
We all live in the protection of certain cowardices which we call our principles.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Why should we think upon things....
Why should we think upon things that are lovely? Because thinking determines life. It is a common habit to blame life upon the environment. Environment modifies life but does not govern life. The soul is stronger than its surroundings.-- William James

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Soap and education are not as....
Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre but they are more deadly in the long run.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Extremists think "communication" means agreeing with....
Extremists think "communication" means agreeing with them.-- Leo Rosten

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  How much of the national news....
How much of the national news that you report to the public each night consists of information you've actually gone out and dug up on your own?-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  How can a question be answered....
How can a question be answered that asks a lifetime of questions?-- Norman Maclean

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The greatest thing you'll ever learn....
The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You cannot step twice into the....
You cannot step twice into the same river.-- Heraclitus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Early to rise and early to....
Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.-- James Thurber

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All right, brain, you don't like....
All right, brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you, but let's just get me through this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.-- Matt Groening

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The future is uncertain... but this....
The future is uncertain... but this uncertainty is at the very heart of human creativity.-- Ilya Prigogine

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We can lick gravity, but sometimes....
We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.-- Wernher von Braun

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The English country gentleman galloping after....
The English country gentleman galloping after a fox -- the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I think; therefore I am.-- Rene....
I think; therefore I am.-- Rene Descartes

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  REFLECTION, n. An action of the....
REFLECTION, n. An action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Man, I was tame compared to....
Man, I was tame compared to what they do now, are you kidding ? All that I ever did was just jiggle.-- Elvis Presley

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never in the field of human....
Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few.-- Sir Winston Churchill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  How helpless we are, like netted....
How helpless we are, like netted birds, when we are caught by desire!-- Belva Plain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Love is the condition in which....
Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.... Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love the greater the jealousy.-- Robert Heinlein

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What's money? A man is a....
What's money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.-- Bob Dylan

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Oh sleep! It is a gentle....
Oh sleep! It is a gentle thing, -- Samuel_Taylor_Coleridge/"

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  How a person masters his fate....
How a person masters his fate is more important than what his fate is.-- Wilhelm von Humboldt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We confess our little faults to....
We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones.-- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  To err is human; to forgive,....
To err is human; to forgive, infrequent.-- Franklin P. Adams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Like its politicians and its wars,....
Like its politicians and its wars, society has the teenagers it deserves.-- J. B. Priestley

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Humility is not disgraceful, and carries....
Humility is not disgraceful, and carries no loss of true pride.-- Ernest Hemingway

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Can there any good thing come....
Can there any good thing come out of Nazareth?-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I decided that it was not....
I decided that it was not wisdom that enabled [poets] to write their poetry, but a kind of instinct or inspiration, such as you find in seers and prophets who deliver all their sublime messages without knowing in the least what they mean.-- Socrates

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The worst thing one can do....
The worst thing one can do is not to try, to be aware of what one wants and not give in to it, to spend years in silent hurt wondering if something could have materialized - never knowing.-- David Viscott

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I can take any amount of....
I can take any amount of criticism as long as I can consider it unqualified praise.-- Noel Coward

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The Romans would never have found....
The Romans would never have found time to conquer the world if they had been obliged first to learn Latin.-- Heinrich Heine

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Accustom yourself continually to make many....
Accustom yourself continually to make many acts of love, for they enkindle and melt the soul.-- Saint Teresa of Avila

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Democracy is the theory that the....
Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A lie can travel halfway around....
A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You sort of start thinking anything's....
You sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough nerve.-- J. K. Rowling

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you find serenity and happiness,....
If you find serenity and happiness, some people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.-- Mother Teresa

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is a melancholy truth that....
It is a melancholy truth that even great men have their poor relations.-- Charles Dickens

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I was born an American; I....
I was born an American; I will live an American; I shall die an American.-- Daniel Webster

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Honesty is the only way with....
Honesty is the only way with anyone, when you'll be so close as to be living inside each other's skins.-- Lois McMaster Bujold

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you hate a person, you....
If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.-- Hermann Hesse

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The average man, who does not....
The average man, who does not know what to do with his life, wants another one which will last forever.-- Anatole France

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The bitterest tears shed over graves....
The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.-- Harriet Beecher Stowe

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Don't fall before you're pushed.-- English....
Don't fall before you're pushed.-- English Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  My motto is: Contented with little,....
My motto is: Contented with little, yet wishing for more.-- Charles Lamb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  [The body is] a marvelous machine...a....
[The body is] a marvelous machine...a chemical laboratory, a power-house. Every movement, voluntary or involuntary, full of secrets and marvels!-- Theodor Herzl

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  PREFERENCE, n. A sentiment, or frame....
PREFERENCE, n. A sentiment, or frame of mind, induced by the erroneous belief that one thing is better than another.--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Life is too short for traffic.--....
Life is too short for traffic.-- Dan Bellack

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  By a curious confusion, many modern....
By a curious confusion, many modern critics have passed from the proposition that a masterpiece may be unpopular to the other proposition that unless it is unpopular it cannot be a masterpiece.-- G. K. Chesterton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Creationist critics often charge that evolution....
Creationist critics often charge that evolution cannot be tested, and therefore cannot be viewed as a properly scientific subject at all. This claim is rhetorical nonsense.-- Stephen Jay Gould

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  That is true wisdom, to know....
That is true wisdom, to know how to alter one's mind when occasion demands it.-- Terence

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I am not in this world....
I am not in this world to live up to other people's expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine.-- Fritz Perls

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you pick up a starving....
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Experience is what causes a person....
Experience is what causes a person to make new mistakes instead of old ones.-- anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  God is not merely interestd in....
God is not merely interestd in the freedom of brown men, yellow men, red men and black men.He is interested in the freedom of the whole human race.-- Martin Luther King Jr.

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Anger is a momentary madness, so....
Anger is a momentary madness, so control your passion or it will control you. -- G. M. Trevelyan

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Money is the opposite of the....
Money is the opposite of the weather. Nobody talks about it, but everybody does something about it.-- Rebecca Johnson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  May your walls know joy; May....
May your walls know joy; May every room hold laughter and every window open to great possibility.-- Maryanne Radmacher-Hershey

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The joy of a spirit is....
The joy of a spirit is the measure of its power.-- Ninon de Lenclos

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many....
EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many methods by which fools prefer to lose their friends.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Build up your weaknesses until they....
Build up your weaknesses until they become your strong points. -- Knute Rockne

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The price one pays for pursuing....
The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.-- James Baldwin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  This above all: to thine own....
This above all: to thine own self be true; And it must follow, as the night the day; Thou canst not then be false to any man.-- William Shakespeare

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I would rather be the candidate....
I would rather be the candidate of the NAACP than the NRA.-- John Kerry

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Frugality without creativity is deprivation.-- Amy....
Frugality without creativity is deprivation.-- Amy Dacyczyn

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Don’t blog what you don’t own.--....
Don't blog what you don't own.-- Lisa Williams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Opera in English is, in the....
Opera in English is, in the main, just about as sensible as baseball in Italian.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The power of man has grown....
The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.-- Sir Winston Churchill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Make no mistake about it: Operation....
Make no mistake about it: Operation Desert Storm truly was a victory of good over evil, of freedom over tyranny, of peace over war.-- Dan Quayle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  American youth attributes much more importance....
American youth attributes much more importance to arriving at driver's license age than at voting age.-- Marshall McLuhan

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  His hand will be against every....
His hand will be against every man, and every man's hand against him.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I daresay one profits more by....
I daresay one profits more by the mistakes one makes off one's own bat than by doing the right thing on somebody's else advice.-- W. Somerset Maugham

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  LINEN, n. "A kind of cloth....
LINEN, n. "A kind of cloth the making of which, when made of hemp, entails a great waste of hemp." -- Calcraft the Hangman.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Shoot for the moon. Even if....
Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars-- Les Brown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I don't believe in guilt, I....
I don't believe in guilt, I believe in living on impulse as long as you never intentionally hurt another person, and don't judge people in your life. I think you should live completely free.-- Angelina Jolie

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  REVELATION, n. A famous book in....
REVELATION, n. A famous book in which St. John the Divine concealed all that he knew. The revealing is done by the commentators, who know nothing.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Man is a clever animal who....
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.-- Albert Schweitzer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  For one human being instinctively feels....
For one human being instinctively feels respect and love for another human being so long as he does not know him well enough to judge him; and that he does not, the craving he feels is evidence.-- Thomas Mann

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions....
Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them: A desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have last-minute stamina, they have to be a little faster, they have to have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill.-- Muhammad Ali

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You make 'em, I amuse 'em.....
You make 'em, I amuse 'em. [children]-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Sometimes when you look in his....
Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving.-- David Letterman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You are not made happy by....
You are not made happy by the true things you believe from your faith, but by the goodness which comes from your faith.-- Emanuel Swedenborg

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Own only what you can carry....
Own only what you can carry with you; know language, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag.-- Alexander Solzhenitsyn

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Don't throw away the old bucket....
Don't throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water.-- Swedish Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Enjoy your own life without comparing....
Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.-- Marquis de Condorcet

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The easiest kind of relationship for....
The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one.-- Joan Baez

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You do ill if you praise,....
You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand.-- Leonardo da Vinci

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Famous actress bragging about her husband:....
Famous actress bragging about her husband: Look at him, isn't he beautiful I have kept him for seven years now"-- Dorothy_Parker/"

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I cannot forecast to you the....
I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma: but perhaps there is a key. That key is Russian national interest.-- Sir Winston Churchill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If I could get my membership....
If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.-- Fred Allen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  An apology for the devil: it....
An apology for the devil: it must be remembered that we have heard only one side of the case; God has written all the books.-- Samuel Butler

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Life changed after that jump...I'd suddenly....
Life changed after that jump...I'd suddenly stepped to the highest level of daring, a level above even that which airplane pilots could attain.-- Charles Lindbergh

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I maintain there is much more....
I maintain there is much more wonder in science than in pseudoscience. And in addition, to whatever measure this term has any meaning, science has the additional virtue, and it is not an inconsiderable one, of being true.-- Carl Sagan

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We can easily forgive a child....
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.-- Plato

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  [The pamphlet] was very patriotic. That....
[The pamphlet] was very patriotic. That is, it talked about killing foreigners.-- Terry Pratchett

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One need not be a chamber....
One need not be a chamber to be haunted;--

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  They say the sun never sets....
They say the sun never sets over the British Empire, but it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.-- Steven Wright

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I don't know much about history,....
I don't know much about history, and I wouldn't give a nickel for all the history in the world. History is more or less bunk. It is tradition. We want to live in the present, and the only history that is worth a tinker's damn is the history we make today.-- Henry Ford

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Books have the same enemies as....
Books have the same enemies as people: fire, humidity, animals, weather, and their own content. -- Paul Valery

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Another possible source of guidance for....
Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth *and* fresher breath.-- Dave Barry

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Age is no guarantee of maturity.--....
Age is no guarantee of maturity.-- Lawana Blackwell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All government -- indeed, every human....
All government -- indeed, every human benefit and enjoyment, every virtue and every prudent act -- is founded on compromise and barter.-- Edmund Burke

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The trouble with fighting for human....
The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.-- H. L. Mencken

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never doubt that a small group....
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.-- Margaret Mead

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The sweet and the sour: this....
The sweet and the sour: this is what makes great art.-- Ward Jenkins

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No matter how smart you are,....
No matter how smart you are, you spend most of your day being an idiot.-- Scott Adams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The best victory is when the....
The best victory is when the opponent surrenders of its own accord before there are any actual hostilities...It is best to win without fighting.-- Sun-tzu

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Morality is the greatest of all....
Morality is the greatest of all tools for leading mankind by the nose.-- Friedrich Nietzsche

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is bad to be oppressed....
It is bad to be oppressed by a minority, but it is worse to be oppressed by a majority. For there is a reserve of latent power in the masses which, if it is called into play, the minority can seldom resist. But from the absolute will of an entire people there is no appeal, no redemption, no refuge but treason.-- Lord Acton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Why should I pay strangers to....
Why should I pay strangers to listen to me talk when I can get strangers to pay to listen to me talk?-- Ellen Degeneres

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Music makes one feel so romantic....
Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same thing nowadays.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I define comfort as self-acceptance. When....
I define comfort as self-acceptance. When we finally learn that self-care begins and ends with ourselves, we no longer demand sustenance and happiness from others.-- Jennifer Louden

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Real love is a permanently self-enlarging....
Real love is a permanently self-enlarging experience.-- M. Scott Peck

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There's a pinch of the madman....
There's a pinch of the madman in every great man.-- Unknown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  True wisdom is seeing what is....
True wisdom is seeing what is beneficial to your eternal life, and managing your life according to that. You do this when you not only know these things and grasp them with your understanding, but also will and do them.-- Emanuel Swedenborg

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Hope is a thing with feathers....
Hope is a thing with feathers --

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of....
Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you have a good friend,....
If you have a good friend, you don't need a mirror.-- German Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Half of the American people have....
Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half.-- Gore Vidal

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Military justice is to justice what....
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.-- Groucho Marx

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  For rarely are sons similar to....
For rarely are sons similar to their fathers: most are worse, and a few are better than their fathers.-- Homer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Of one thing I am certain,....
Of one thing I am certain, the body is not the measure of healing - peace is the measure.-- George Melton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  To be conscious that we are....
To be conscious that we are perceiving or thinking is to be conscious of our own existence.-- Aristotle

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Have regard for your name, since....
Have regard for your name, since it will remain for you longer than a great store of gold.-- Ecclesiasticus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If there were no God, there....
If there were no God, there would be no Atheists.-- G. K. Chesterton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When you relinquish the desire to....
When you relinquish the desire to control your future, you can have more happiness.-- Nicole Kidman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  You gain strength, courage, and confidence....
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience by which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.-- Eleanor Roosevelt

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  All that is human must retrograde....
All that is human must retrograde if it does not advance.-- Edward Gibbon

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Love is an irresistable desire to....
Love is an irresistable desire to be irresistably desired.-- Robert Frost

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The difficulty is not so great....
The difficulty is not so great to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for.-- Homer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable....
LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like _caries_ and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Reprimand not a child immediately on....
Reprimand not a child immediately on the offence. Wait till the irritation has been replaced by serenity.-- Moses Hasid

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Cherish all your happy moments: they....
Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age.-- Christopher Morley

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  One ought to seek out virtue....
One ought to seek out virtue for its own sake, without being influenced by fear or hope, or by any external influence. Moreover, that in that does happiness consist.-- Diogenes Laertius

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The holy passion of Friendship is....
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I don't need a baby growing....
I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to acheive that state the old fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before.-- Ellen DeGeneres

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never lose sight of this important....
Never lose sight of this important truth, that no one can be truly great until he has gained a knowledge of himself, a knowledge which can only be acquired by occasional retirement.-- Johann Georg von Zimmermann

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If I only had an hour....
If I only had an hour to chop down a tree, I would spend the first 45 minutes sharpening my axe.-- Abraham Lincoln

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The man who doesn't read good....
The man who doesn't read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them.-- Mark Twain

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Underpromise; overdeliver.-- Tom Peters ....
Underpromise; overdeliver.-- Tom Peters

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Fear is the main source of....
Fear is the main source of superstition, and one of the main sources of cruelty. To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.-- Bertrand Russell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  But what is the difference between....
But what is the difference between literature and journalism?-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  An ignorant person is one who....
An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.-- Will Rogers

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Discretion is the better part of....
Discretion is the better part of valor.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In the Soviet army it takes....
In the Soviet army it takes more courage to retreat than to advance.-- Joseph Stalin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  An education was a bit like....
An education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.-- Terry Pratchett

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  How could I lose to such....
How could I lose to such an idiot?-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When I took office, only high....
When I took office, only high energy physicists had ever heard of what is called the Worldwide Web.... Now even my cat has its own page.-- Bill Clinton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  DEPENDENT, adj. Reliant upon another's generosity....
DEPENDENT, adj. Reliant upon another's generosity for the support which you are not in a position to exact from his fears.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The more pity, that fools may....
The more pity, that fools may not speak wisely what wise men do foolishly.-- William Shakespeare

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Even the great get greater by....
Even the great get greater by doing more of it.-- Colleen Wainwright

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  To play it safe is not....
To play it safe is not to play.-- Robert Altman

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  It is because modern education is....
It is because modern education is so seldom inspired by a great hope that it so seldom achieves great results. The wish to preserve the past rather that the hope of creating the future dominates the minds of those who control the teaching of the young.-- Bertrand Russell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Talent hits a target no one....
Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see.-- Arthur Schopenhauer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Neither should you fret too much....
Neither should you fret too much about 'writer's block'. If you're looking at a blank piece of paper and nothing comes to you, then go do something else. Writer's block is just a symptom of feeling like you have nothing to say, combined with the rather weird idea that you SHOULD feel the need to say something.-- Hugh Macleod

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Tax reform means "Don't tax you,....
Tax reform means "Don't tax you, don't tax me, tax that fellow behind the tree."-- Unknown (can you tell me?)

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Fear keeps pace with hope. Nor....
Fear keeps pace with hope. Nor does their so moving together surprise me; both belong to a mind in suspense, to a mind in a state of anxiety through looking into the future. Both are mainly due to projecting our thoughts far ahead of us instead of adapting ourselves to the present. Thus it is that foresight, the greatest blessing humanity has been given, is transformed into a curse.-- Seneca

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The people's good is the highest....
The people's good is the highest law.-- Cicero

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Were this world an endless pain,....
Were this world an endless pain, and by sailing eastward we could forever reach new distances, and discover sights more sweet and strange than any Cyclades or Islands of King Solomon, then there were promise in the voyage.-- Herman Melville

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I do not know the American....
I do not know the American gentleman, god forgive me for putting two such words together. -- Charles Dickens

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Now begins a torrent of words....
Now begins a torrent of words and a trickling of sense.-- Theocritus of Chios

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Never esteem anything as of advantage....
Never esteem anything as of advantage to you that will make you break your word or lose your self-respect.-- Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers.-- Alfred....
Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers.-- Alfred Lord Tennyson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Think to yourself that every day....
Think to yourself that every day is your last; the hour to which you do not look forward will come as a welcome surprise.-- Horace

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Some succeed because they are destined....
Some succeed because they are destined to, but most succeed because they are determined to.-- Henry Van Dyke

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We have some salt of our....
We have some salt of our youth in us.-- William Shakespeare

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  We learn from experience that men....
We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.-- George Bernard Shaw

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  What more felicity can fall to....
What more felicity can fall to creature, than to enjoy delight with liberty.-- Edmund Spenser

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Watch and pray, that ye enter....
Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  After all, one knows one's weak....
After all, one knows one's weak points so well, that it's rather bewildering to have the critics overlook them and invent others.-- Edith Wharton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  From Stettin in the Baltic to....
From Stettin in the Baltic to Trieste in the Adriatic an iron curtain has descended across the Continent.-- Sir Winston Churchill

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  If you have a beautiful face....
If you have a beautiful face you don't need big fake boobs to get anyone's attention.-- Paris Hilton

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Man is a rational animal who....
Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason.-- Oscar Wilde

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  When we are angry or depressed....
When we are angry or depressed in our creativity, we have misplaced our power. We have allowed someone else to determine our worth, and then we are angry at being undervalued.-- Julia Cameron

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Not everything that is faced can....
Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.-- James Baldwin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Nobody knows the age of the....
Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it is old enough to know better.-- Anonymous

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Familiarity breeds contempt, while rarity wins....
Familiarity breeds contempt, while rarity wins admiration.-- Apuleius

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No matter how love-sick a woman....
No matter how love-sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along.-- Dr. Joyce Brothers

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Creativity comes from trust. Trust your....
Creativity comes from trust. Trust your instincts. And never hope more than you work.-- Rita Mae Brown

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Truly great madness can not be....
Truly great madness can not be achieved without significant intelligence.-- Henrik Tikkanen

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  He that lives on hope will....
He that lives on hope will die fasting.-- American Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The ultimate good desired is better....
The ultimate good desired is better reached by free trade in ideas [and] the best test of truth is the power of the thought to get itself accepted in the competition of the market.-- Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Be the first to the field....
Be the first to the field and the last to the couch. -- Chinese Proverb

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  In times of universal deceit, telling....
In times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.-- George Orwell

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  I don't know who my grandfather....
I don't know who my grandfather was; I'm much more concerned to know what his grandson will be.-- Abraham Lincoln

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  RELIQUARY, n. A receptacle for such....
RELIQUARY, n. A receptacle for such sacred objects as pieces of the true cross, short-ribs of the saints, the ears of Balaam's ass, the lung of the cock that called Peter to repentance and so forth. Reliquaries are commonly of metal, and provided with a lock to prevent the contents from coming out and performing miracles at unseasonable times. A feather from the wing of the Angel of the Annunciation once escaped during a sermon in Saint Peter's and so tickled the noses of the congregation that they woke and sneezed with great vehemence three times each. It is related in the "Gesta Sanctorum" that a sacristan in the Canterbury cathedral surprised the head of Saint Dennis in the library. Reprimanded by its stern custodian, it explained that it was seeking a body of doctrine. This unseemly levity so raged the diocesan that the offender was publicly anathematized, thrown into the Stour and replaced by another head of Saint Dennis, brought from Rome.-- Ambrose Bierce

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Democracy is two wolves and a....
Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote!-- Benjamin Franklin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Associate yourself with men of good....
Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation, for 'tis better to be alone than in bad company.-- George Washington

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Gray skies are just clouds passing....
Gray skies are just clouds passing over.-- Duke Ellington

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  There is a lion in the....
There is a lion in the way; a lion is in the streets.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Not every age is fit for....
Not every age is fit for childish sports.-- Titus Maccius Plautus

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  A husband is what's left of....
A husband is what's left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.-- Helen Rowland

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Laws too gentle are seldom obeyed;....
Laws too gentle are seldom obeyed; to severe, seldom executed.-- Benjamin Franklin

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Blessed is he who expects nothing,....
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.-- Alexander Pope

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  No man has the right to....
No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit.-- Ansel Adams

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Every patient carries her or his....
Every patient carries her or his own doctor inside.-- Albert Schweitzer

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  Amend your ways and your doings.--....
Amend your ways and your doings.-- Bible

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.
  The cost of living is going....
The cost of living is going up and the chance of living is going down.-- Flip Wilson

 
For More JOKES and FUNNY Stuff visit my previous posts and archive links on the right hand side of this page.

Google Video of the Day

Courtesy of Video.KiTT.NeT


Description
A collection of the best and most witty quotations in the world. I hope you enjoy my collection. Please bookmark this page and check back soon as it is updated every other hour! Subscribe for more fun!

Brought to You in League With...

UKRifter Virtual Reality
UKRifter Virtual Reality News from the world of Oculus,
HTC Vive, Razer HDK & Playstation VR. Subscribe today!



Previous Posts
[The television is] an invention that....
[The television is] an invention that....
[The superior man] acts before he....
Would that the Roman people had....
[He was] a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious....
[Optimism is] the obstinacy of maintaining....
Neither a borrower nor a lender....
[When asked what was the proper....
Separate together in a bunch. [And....
The ultimate good desired is better....

Archives
October 2006 / November 2006 / December 2006 / January 2007 / February 2007 / March 2007 / April 2007 / May 2007 / June 2007 / July 2007 / August 2007 / September 2007 / October 2007 / November 2007 / December 2007 / January 2008 / February 2008 / March 2008 / April 2008 / May 2008 / June 2008 / November 2008 / December 2008 / January 2009 / February 2009 / March 2009 / April 2009 / May 2009 / June 2009 / July 2009 / August 2009 / September 2009 / October 2009 / November 2009 / December 2009 / January 2010 / February 2010 / March 2010 / April 2010 / May 2010 / June 2010 / July 2010 / August 2010 / September 2010 / October 2010 / November 2010 / December 2010 / January 2011 / February 2011 / March 2011 / April 2011 / May 2011 / June 2011 / July 2011 / August 2011 / September 2011 / October 2011 / November 2011 / December 2011 / January 2012 / February 2012 / March 2012 / April 2012 / May 2012 / June 2012 / July 2012 / August 2012 / September 2012 / October 2012 / November 2012 / December 2012 /

Twitter Facebook
MySpace Digg
Hit a button to share with your friends

Powered by Blogger